Friday, November 15, 2013
Sunday, October 27, 2013
Thursday, August 22, 2013
Long long ago in the dark dim distant days of slim youth there lived a chap known to some of us as 'the boy from Lapland'-his first name was actually Trev...now The boy from Lapland was not actually from Lapland, but at that time this TV show was on called'The boy from Lapland'...now Trev look a liking to the theme tune, which developed into an obsession...he was a very keen golf player and was always on kenton school field, playing golf(always by himself) and would constantly sing this bloody tune whilst playing golf...you could here him bawling his head off on the field all over the estate, at all times of the day...he never tired of it...so whenever we saw him we would greet him not with 'hello Trev' but with'oy loy loy, loy loy loy, loy loy loy loy, loy loy loy loy,loy loy loy' which seem seemed to delight him...I never forgot this and whenever I saw him on occasion in a bar/in the street/in a supermarket etc over the next 35 years I would sing this...his eyes would still light up, and a smile of delight would spread across his ancient haggered litso(face)...
But coming soon...The terrible tale of The boy from Lapland 2...
Monday, August 19, 2013
'I remember one summer...must have been 1981 the KBAB and NKAB had allied with the BAB in the war v the NHAB...for some reason we went down Blakelaw, and the BAB started to join us...as we walked down the horrible streets they all started whistling this theme tune..more and more of the BAB came out at the sound of the whistling, jumping over hedges and joining the entourage...they kept on whistling it, it getting louder and louder as more and more riff-raff joined the seething throng...it was obviously a signal to muster the troops, bit like in West Side Story...'
Tuesday, July 2, 2013
'When I was a kid on Kenton Bar Estate my mam and dad used to sit in the front room smoking their head's off;my mam used to smoke and when she needed to tap the ash off when it got too long she used to flip the back of her slipper off and dab the ash onto the inside of her slipper then put her foot back into the slipper;she would repeat this process every time the ash got too long, so the soul of her heel was always black...meanwhile my dad would be smoking his Golden Virginia rolly...he didn't use an ashtray, but would dab the ash off onto the lid of the baccy tin, then crush the but on it then blow the extinguished but and ash off the tin onto the carpet...one day I curiously asked him why he did this...his reply was 'what does it matter?your mother will hoover them up in the morning'...so our front room carpet in the split levels was always covered in ash and backy butts on a night...
Also when my mam washed our clothes she used to dry them on a clothes horse in the front room next to the heating vent...as they both smoked like 40 fags a day my clean clothes were quickly rendered unclean and I always stank of smoke...
Thursday, June 13, 2013
Anybody remember the power of the flush? I do – sticks in my mind like a toothpick in the eye. Let me enlighten you oh dear readers……………..
The toilets on KBE were regular toilets, no magic parts in ‘em EXCEPT that by some strange quirk of design the cistern was elevated way way above the toilet itself by about 4-5 feet ( I am talking from experience of the 4 bed gas/electric houses by the way and specifically the downstairs water closet by the back door.) Pulling the string in one of these suckers was like releasing the whirlwind. The gurgle then massive flush with the power of a tsunami on overdrive was enough to make me scared as a 4 year old so much so that I hated using that toilet preferring to go upstairs. Even the ordinary toilets had a mighty flush and there was no danger of date marks on those bowls – clean enough to eat off. I am sure even bacteria could not have held on. Needless to say that Mr. Grey at the VG never sold a single toilet brush in all the years he was the shopkeeper.